Wednesday, May 19, 2010

No one to thank but Allah.

I have been feeling really sad in the past two days or so. & I have been crying. alot. Crying because I'm scared. Crying because I'm lonely. Crying because I'm a sinner. Crying because I'm weak. Crying because I disappointed those whom I love. Crying because I'm not perfect. As much as I want to be the best I can be, I'm never there. I get upset over things I should have done, or could have done...but didn't do.

I feel like everyone has a childhood friend,
but me.
I feel like everyone has someone they can depend on,
but me.
I feel like everyone has a shoulder to cry on,
but me.

Sometimes I think people find it hard to communicate with me,
or maybe I find it hard to relate to them?
Whatever it is, I feel like no one really knows me.
They don't know that deep down,
I have a big heart.
I'm a genuinely nice person.
I like to spoil the people I love.
To be honest, it's rare to find someone like me.
Is this why I'm all alone?
Why dont they notice me?
Why do I feel so invisible?

After all, I'm only human. I have feelings, too. Somebody hug me.

So then, I was so exhausted I took a 30 minute nap.
I woke up feeling so much happier, alhamdulilah.

It's amazing what sleep can do to you. & chocolates. & prayer.
I've got no one to thank,
but Allah.

13 comments:

  1. oh i love this :(

    ive been doing alot of crying and generally feeling upset the last few days. and ur right, amazing what prayer can do for u. haven't been sleeping so cant call it amazing just yet lol. but yeh, all thanks to Allah [swt] =)

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  2. I understand what you mean. Honestly, 110% sister.

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  3. Aww I'm glad you are feeling better now. We all have those days when everything feels wrong but yes, sleep on it and inshaAllah it'll go away (if it's nothing major). Of course, as you said, it's all by the will of God.

    Yes you are special, I can tell =) I'm sure you have friends who love you! And inshaAllah you'll find more who will appreciate you just the way you are *hugs*

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  4. aww sis I understand how that feels. You are definitely someone special. Sometimes we don't realize how much we mean to a person. I know you dont know me very well or vice versa but if you there is anything I can do I'm here inshallah. *hug* take care hun. x

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  5. salam, i can understand your situation, even i have these sad days at time, and i remember recently when i had a bad day i was waiting for the night to approach so i would sleep and there would be a better day tomoro. sleep is indeed a blessing of Allah,

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  6. awwwwwwww, HUGSSSSSS! Hugssssssss! Hugsssssssssss!! I'm glad you're feeling better :D

    You know, sis- we're all sinners. The fact that you could cry about it, though, inshaAllah, means something <3 Ma'shaAllah. It's much better than those who don't care.

    You know, in real life, at the moment, I don't have many friends. I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for the forum I'm on. Would you like to join? It's MSU, Muslim Sisters Unite. Many of us are on it and believe me, you'll always find someone willing to hug ya :D Besides, maybe someone lives in your area?

    Allah Subhanoo wa' Tala is always Near. Never forget that. If you feel like you have no one to talk to, He is there <3 Also, remember that

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  7. You do have a friend who has been with you forever and will be with you forever; Allah! You do have someone to depend on, the only one we can depend on for everything and anything, the one who holds our life and everything in his hands; Allah. You do have someone to cry too, the only one who is the forgiver of our sins, and the only one who can give us happiness and peace; Allah. You are never alone, Allah is always there. Allah should be our best friends. The first one we should go to with whatever we need and anything we want. The only one we should need. *e-bear huggggg!* And, btw, you have a lot of people that care about you sister, i know i do. I really wanted to meet you, and im glad i did. Xo. =)

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  8. Asalamu Alaikum sis,
    I agree with muslimah93, Allah is always there for you. and we are ALL here for u sis. u got an email? let me know.

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  9. Aww jazakAllah khair for all your beautiful words mashaAllah. SubhanAllah I'm so blessed to have you girls in my life...kind of. lol I wish I could personally hug each and everyone of you and let u know how special you are. <3

    :) BubbliMuslima: my email is f.izmanng@gmail.com, feel free to email.

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  10. i. have. been. there.

    actually I go there a lot. i'm a perfectionist and it is awful when i sit back and realize that nothing can be perfect...

    chocolate, prayer, and naps usually do the trick for me too.

    alhamdulillah I'm glad you are feeling better :-)

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  11. salam. sis i love this. this is real sisterhood.

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  12. Alhamdulilah you feel better now sister...we all have our days and we have to remember we all get tested in some way or another by Allah, but when we sin the most important thing to remember is to repent to Allah to ask for forgivness... but keep the faith hun Allah is always with you:)

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  13. Assalaam Alaikum sister,

    Insha'Allah this message finds you happy, healthy and in the best of Iman. I recently came across your blog, through mine, and love it! You have some beautiful entries.

    And I know exactly what you mean, sometimes I feel so alone as well. Like no one understands me, but in those times I remember that Allah (SWT) is always with each and every person. He loves us, and the reason why He tests us in the ways He does is because He believes we are able to bear the burden and learn from the experience (no one shall bear a burden greater than he can bear, Al-Baqarah:286).

    Alhumdulillah I'm glad to hear you're feeling better! <3

    Stay smiling, and thanks for paying a visit to my blog. :)

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